Just for Fun
We hope you enjoy!

Jokes
(Groaners actually!)

What meat did Noah’s wife serve at every meal?
Ham!

 What did the duck say when Noah gave him his lunch?

Put it on my bill!

What could Samson, the strongest man in the world only hold for a few minutes?

His breath!

How many books of the Bible are named after Esther?

Twenty-two… The rest were named before Esther!

When Moses stood on Mt. Sinai, his back was to the east,

and his face was to the west. What was on his right hand?

His fingers!

Which commandment do baseball players break?

The eighth commandment. They steal bases!

What is it that God gives away and then keeps?

His promises!

What do we have that Adam never had?

Ancestors!

The following riddle was written over 100 years ago.
The answer is one word, five letters long.

God made Adam out of dust,

     But thought it best to make me first:

So I was made before the man,

     According to God's holy plan.

My whole body God made complete,

     Without arms or hands or feet.

My ways and acts did God control,

     But in my body He placed no soul.

A living being I became,

     And Adam gave to me a name.

Then from his presence I withdrew,

     For this man Adam I never knew.

All my Maker's laws I do obey,

     And from these laws I never stray.

Thousands of me go in fear,

     But seldom on the earth appear.

Later, for a purpose God did see,

     He placed a living soul in me.

But that soul of mine God had to claim,

     And from me He took it back again.

And when this soul from me had fled,

     I was the same as when first made;

Without arms, legs, feet, or soul,

     I travel on from pole to pole.

My labors are from day to night,

     And to men I once furnished light.

Thousands of people both young and old,

     Did by my death bright lights behold.

No right or wrong can I conceive;

     The Bible and its teachings I can't believe.

The fear of death doesn't trouble me;

     Pure happiness I will never see.

And up in Heaven I can never go,

     Nor in the grave or Hell below.

So get your Bible and read with care;

     You'll find my name recorded there.
Click here for the answer

The names of sixteen books of the Bible are hidden in the following paragraph.
Can you find all sixteen of them?

I once made a remark about the hidden books of the Bible. It was a lulu. Kept people looking so hard for facts and for others it was a revelation. Some were in a jam, especially since the names of the books were not capitalized. But the truth finally struck home to numbers of readers. To others, it was a real job. We want it to be a most fascinating few moments for you. Yes, there will be some really easy ones to spot. Others may require judges to help them. I will quickly admit it usually takes a minister to find one of them, and there will be loud lamentations when it is found. One little lady says she brews a cup of tea, so she can concentrate better. See how well you can compete. Relax now for there are really sixteen names of books of the Bible in this story.

Click here for the answers

Church Bulletin Bloopers!

The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.

The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water."

The sermon tonight: "Searching for Jesus."

Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale.

It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house.

Bring your husbands.

The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.

Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.

Miss Charlene Mason sang "I will not pass this way again,"
giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.

For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir will sing: "Break Forth Into Joy."

Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church.
So ends a friendship that began in their school days.

A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.

At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What Is Hell?"

Come early and listen to our choir practice.

Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.

The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility.

Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.

The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. 
They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.

This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church.
Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.

The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him
their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.

Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7PM.

Please use the back door.

The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church basement
Friday at 7 PM.

The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church.
Please use large double door at the side entrance.